Arranged Love

5th August, 2003

Tring Tring…

The phone went through a complete ring without any answer. This was maybe the hundredth time I tried calling Akash in the last couple of hours. I was initially frustrated, but was getting concerned and nervous by now.

Akash and I had been engaged for almost 3 months now, and he had never failed to call me a single day (well, until today)…

3 months back (7th and 8th May 2003)

It was my last day in college, farewell day for my batch. After the usual hugs with friends, cries, ‘I will miss you’, ‘Keep in touch’ and other such dialogues, it was finally time to leave. I left college at 5pm and reached home around 5:20pm.

I went to my room, freshened up, changed my clothes and went to the kitchen. My mom was washing utensils – holding a bowl in one hand and applying the dish soap using the other hand.

I casually asked her for a cup of tea. My mom stared at me and said “You better start learning how to make your own tea. Being a girl, you will move to your in-laws’ house one day and there will be no mom to make tea for you. You need to make tea for everyone in the family”.

“Oh, come on mom. I am so tired today after the farewell party. Besides, what’s the rush to learn the ‘art of making tea’ so soon. I still have time”, I said with a mischievous smile.

Mom: “Well, you don’t have any more time left. Better start to learn cooking as well soon”

Me: “What?”

Mom: “We just got a wonderful proposal for you. The groom’s family just left our house few mins before you came”

I was shocked. I hoped that she was just kidding. But, having known my family for years, I suspected that this might be true. My heart started beating fast.

Me: “Mom, You are just making fun of me right?”

Mom: “No dear. We did get a nice proposal. Of course, nothing has been decided. We will definitely get your opinion before we commit to your in-laws”

‘your in-laws’  – These words struck my head like a hammer, and I started feeling dizzy. That pretty much meant that everything was finalized.

Me: “This is not fair mom. I just finished college. I haven’t even received my final year results. How can you get me married so soon.”

Mom: “Girls during my days were married off even before we completed school. Your dad married me when I was just 14 years.”

Me: “That was during your generation. Things have changed now. I want to work for few years. Please mom, please..”

Mom: “Enough Kavya. Go to your room. We have enough people working in the family. We don’t need you to work to support us”

Me: “But, mom…”

Even before I could complete my sentence, mom stared at me with her eyes wide open. She raised her right hand, closed 4 of her fingers, and kept the index finger vertically on her closed lips – signalling me to keep quiet.

Drops of tears started flowing from my eyes. I ran out of the kitchen, and went to my room. I fell down on my bed and started crying. How can this happen to me? Please god, please.. let this be a dream.  I started praying to god more than how much I had prayed before my 12th class results were out.

But, I knew that things won’t change. I knew that no amount of hue and cry will get me out of this situation. I live in a village on the outskirts of Kerala. Though my state was high on literacy, early arranged marriages were still the norms in smaller villages. And, my family was pretty strict when it came to marriage.

I have 3 elder sisters – Two of them were married off during their first year of college while the eldest was married even before college. I was in fact lucky that my family waited till I finished my college. Though it was not a big surprise to me, I still couldn’t believe it. The thought of marriage, leaving my parents’ home, and staying with a totally new family scared me. Most importantly, I wanted to work. Only very few girls from my village went to work. That too, they were forced to stop working after marriage. I hoped to work for at least couple of years before getting married and becoming a housewife. I had attended couple of campus interviews in my college and was waiting for the results. I was confident of getting selected. And, I had big dreams of working in top IT companies. But now, my dreams have been shattered.

I continued crying and stayed in bed the whole night. I didn’t even eat dinner that night. And, I don’t remember when I fell asleep. I woke up around 7am in the morning and went out of my room.

I saw my brother sitting on the sofa and reading a newspaper. I went and stood next to him, silently, without uttering a word. He noticed me immediately and said, “Congrats Kavya!! I still remember you being a small child, but you are now ready to move on to the next phase of your life” – the enthusiasm in his voice was quite evident.

Me: “I… I want to talk to you.”

Brother: “Sure, I know you will have a ton of questions – like what is his name, how does he look like, what does he do, etc”.

Me: “Not that. It’s about the marriage itself. I don’t want to get married so soon..”

Brother: “You know about our family. I wish I could help. But, this is out of my control. I had tried talking to our parents when the proposal initially came couple of months back. But, they didn’t listen. The groom is a doctor in the United States. He comes from a well respected family. There is no way our family will let go of this wonderful proposal”

Me: “Couple of months back? So, this has been going on for quite a while then? At least you could have given me a hint. Why brother… Why… Why didn’t you tell me about this before? Just because the groom is in the US doesn’t mean we should agree to this proposal. I don’t want to get married so soon”

Brother: “Sorry Kavya. I didn’t want this to disturb your final year exams. Anyway, no use talking about the past.”

“Listen… I have something to cheer you up.. I have a photo of your fiance’. Don’t you want to take a look at your future husband?”, said my brother with a smile.

“As if I have a choice to say no..”, I said with a frown on my face.

Brother: “Don’t worry. Things will get better. Here is his photo… “. My brother handed me the photo.

I took a look at the photo. The photo was of a tall man (around 6 foot) standing in front of a picturesque lake. He looked well built, not as handsome as the heroes of Indian movies, but good looking.

Me: “Looks like he is quite tall. I am only 5″ 2. Won’t I look short in the marriage photos?”

Brother: “Ha.. someone who said no to marriage just a few mins back is now worried about her marriage photos”.

I started blushing. My cheeks turned pink with embarrassment. I was still mad at my family for fixing my marriage so soon. But, hey, I am a girl. Which girl wouldn’t feel shy by seeing the photo of her fiance’?

I held the photo close to my heart and ran to my room, smiling with shyness. I kept looking at the photo and trying to absorb the thought of marriage, when I suddenly heard my mom calling me – “Kavya, come here fast. Your fiance’ is on the phone. He wants to talk to you”.

My heart started beating fast. I came out of my room and went to the hall. The land line phone was located near the sofa. It was a black colored phone, with the number keys in white. My mom was holding the phone receiver in her right hand. My brother was sitting on the sofa. My dad, some of my uncles, aunties and couple of my cousins were standing just a few inches away from the phone.

I had never talked to any guy in my entire life (except of course my dad, uncles, brothers and maybe few teachers). I had studied in a girls’ school and college. So, I had never talked to boys before. I took the phone from my mom. But, my hands started trembling. I kept the phone receiver on my ears, and tried to say Hello. But, I was too nervous, and only air came out of my mouth.

“Hi Kavya. How are you?”

“I …. am…. fi… fine…”

“This is Akash here”

I just realized that I didn’t even know his name at that time.

“O….kay. How… ar… are… you?”

“I am good. You seem to be nervous. What’s up? Not feeling well?”

“N….No….. jus… just… nerv….nervous”. I couldn’t talk any more. I was just breathing heavily into the phone.

“Ok Kavya. I think you are too nervous to talk now. I understand. I will maybe give you a call some other time. Bye.”

I was not even able to say bye. I placed the receiver on the phone. My cousins immediately started giggling and asking, “What did you guys talk.. how was his voice.. etc etc”. I was too shocked to pay attention to them, forget about answering them.

***

Akash started calling me everyday after that. For the first couple of days, we talked for only maybe 10-15 mins. That too, he did most of the talking. I didn’t have a cell phone, and so he had to call the landline – which meant that there were always people around me when I talked to him. That really embarrassed me. I couldn’t talk to him freely :-( So, there were no romantic talks yet. It was just “Hi”, “Bye”, and getting to know a bit about each other.

 

11th May 2003

Today was the 4th day since I first talked to Akash.

Akash: “So, how are things going?”

Me: “Going fine.. How is it going for you?”

Akash: “Going ok… “

Just then, my mom called out to me – “Kavya, you have a courier… come here”

I asked Akash to hold on for a moment and went to collect the courier. It was a brown colour package. I signed for it and received the package. Had it been some other time, I would have been curious to open it right there. But, since Akash was on the phone, I didn’t really bother to check what was in the package or who had sent it.

Holding the package in my right hand, I picked up the phone receiver with my left hand.

Me: “Hi.. I am back”

Akash: “What did mom say?”

Me: “Oh.. Nothing. It was just a package”

Akash: “Package? What is in it?”

Me: “I don’t know. I will open it after our call”

Akash: “Why don’t you open it now? I can wait on the call”

Me: “That’s ok.. Its not urgent. I can open it later”

Akash: “It might be something important. Go ahead and check it out”

Me: “Well, Ok”.

I opened the brown wrapping. There was a red gift wrap inside. Now, I started getting curious after seeing the gift wrap. I carefully removed the gift wrap. Inside, there was a white box. On the box, there was a photo of a cell phone. On the top of the box, there was this text in black, bold font – “Samsung SGX-5351 Cell Phone”. I opened the box and took out the silver coloured cell phone. I was not able to guess who would have sent this to me. I wondered if it was meant for someone else and was delivered to me by mistake.

Akash: “What happened? Are you there?”

Me: “Ya, I am here”

Akash: “Did you open the package?”

Me: “Yes, It is a cell phone”

Akash: “Oh.. who has gifted it to you?”

I was about to say “No”, but then realized it could be Akash who has gifted it.

Me: “Was it you?”

Akash: “Yes, my dear. Do you like it?”

It was the first time he had used the word ‘dear’. I felt goosebumps. I was excited by my first gift.

Me: “Thanks. But, it was not necessary for you to…”

Akash interrupted and said, “Come on, we have been talking for 4 days now and hardly know each other. I know that you have no privacy with the landline. So, I thought that a cell phone would be a perfect gift. I ordered it online yesterday and scheduled the delivery so that I am on the phone with you when you receive it”

I started smiling, but was too shy to say anything.

Akash: “Ok. I was able to only get a cell phone. You need to get the SIM. Next time when I call you, give me your cell number. Bye for now”

Me: “Bye..”

 

14th May 2003

It took a couple of days before I could get a SIM. Today was the first day Akash called me on my cell phone.

Akash: “Hi”

Me: “Hi…”

Akash: “So, finally we get to talk with some privacy. Hope no one is around you..”

Me: “I am in my room. No one is around”

Akash: “Ok good. I have been wanting to ask you something since the first day. It may be a bit premature, but it is important. Since it is an arranged marriage, I wanted to make sure you actually like me. Don’t agree to the marriage just because your parents force you to. I know it is too early to judge me, but tell me… do you like me? Are you really interested in this marriage?”

I was not sure what to say. It was true that I did not want to get married so early. But, if I told anything to Akash, that will surely reach my parents’ ears and I will be screwed. I can maybe tell Akash that I don’t want to get married now. And, he might even help put off the marriage. But, my parents will surely get me married off to someone else soon. And who knows how that ‘someone’ will be? He may not be as good as Akash. So, I decided to keep quiet.

Akash: “Are you there..?”

Me: “Ya, I am here. Things are happening so fast. Like you said, it’s been hardly a week. So, I really cannot tell anything now. But, I do like you so far”

Akash: “Ok. No pressure. Let’s take our time to understand each other. If there is anything you want to tell me, feel free.”

***

We started talking a lot after that. From initial 15 minute calls, it turned to hours. And sometimes, Akash used to call me multiple times in a day and we used to talk about so many things – our favorite things, college life, about his family, my family, life in the US, politics, films, food, gossip and what not..

 

10th June 2003

Akash: “Have you ever bunked school / college and went out to movies?”

Me: “Ha ha. No way. Both my parents are very strict. I have no freedom at all. My parents won’t even let me go out alone (except for college). During my school days, my dad used to drop me at the school gate, and he used to pick me up on time. Even during college, they had teachers as spies. They made sure I go from home to only college, and back to home.”

Akash: “Parents are always like that. That too, being parents of such a beautiful girl like you, they do need to be extra careful”.

Me: “Am I really that beautiful? Be honest… You must have seen even more gorgeous girls in the US”

Akash: “Hmm…. Well, I have seen beautiful girls, but none like you. You have the perfect homely girl features”

“I know you are just telling that for my sake”, I said with a blush.

Akash: “No, I am serious. You are really beautiful. I am sure many guys would have proposed to you”

Me: “You have no idea about my parents. They wouldn’t let a guy think of me, forget about proposing. Once, a guy tried to follow me on my way from college to home. He just tried it on one day. I didn’t even inform my parents as I was afraid they might do something to him or they might start suspecting me. But my dad somehow came to know about him and the very next day the guy had a broken arm.”

“Oh.. wow… Hope your dad doesn’t break my arm”, said Akash with laughter.

Me: “Even if he breaks, you are a doctor na.. you can fix it..”

Akash: “Ha ha… good one.. So, tell me… It’s been a month now since we started talking. What do you feel about me?”

Me: “Initially I was afraid that you might be strict like my parents. But, you are very casual and friendly. I like that.”

 

15th June 2003

Me: “I wanted to ask you something… if you don’t mind”

Akash: “Of course not.. what is it?”

Me: “As I said before, I don’t have much exposure to the outside world. I have lived all my years so far only in 3 places – my home, school and college. I just have one small wish. I wish to work for a few years… will you… will you let me work?

Akash: “Work? Why? I am a doctor. I earn enough to run our family. I don’t want to give you the trouble of working. You will have enough work to do at home.”

I started sobbing. Akash sounded like a friendly person, and I thought that he will fulfil my wish. But, maybe I was expecting too much… I couldn’t talk anymore.

Akash: “Hey… are you crying?.. Don’t cry.. please… I was just kidding”

Me: “What?…  Kidding?”

Akash: “Yes, I just wanted to tease you… sorry, I didn’t realize you would take it so seriously… I will of course let you work dear… “

Me: “Really?” My eyes lit up as I said this. “Will you really let me work? Or, you are just saying it so that I don’t get hurt?”

Akash: “I am serious this time. I wanted to have some fun with you and so said that you can’t work. But, I actually want you to work. There is no question of whether I will let you work or not. It is your right. No one can deny it. If you want to work, yes, you will work. You just need to inform me, not ask for my permission.”

I think it was that moment when my ‘like’ for Akash turned to ‘love’. I felt like I was on cloud nine. Going to work was a big dream for me. When he said ‘yes’, especially when he said ‘it was my right’ and all that, my heart melted.

Me: “Thanks. Thank you so much…”

Akash: “There is no need to thank me for this..”

Me: “No.. But, this is big for me. No girl in my entire village has been allowed to work after marriage.”

Akash: “It’s no big deal… I just want my sweetheart to be happy”

Me: “I… I want to say one more thing to you….”

Akash: “Go ahead..”

I needed all the courage in the world to say what I was thinking… I opened my mouth slowly and whispered the magical words, “I… I love you..”.

Akash: “I love you too Kavya”

Neither of us had exchanged these golden words till now. I felt like I was on top of the world…. No.. It was more that that… It was a feeling that cannot be described….

 

4th August 2003

Everything seemed to be going perfectly between us. I felt like we were the best couple in the world. We used to have small small arguments, but one us will usually give in to the other person. What happened on 4th August also seemed like any other small argument…

Akash: “Good news… I finally booked my ticket to India. I will be leaving here on 10th September and will arrive there on the 11th.”

Me: “Oh… But, that’s too close to the wedding. Remember that we are getting married on the 15th of September.”

Akash: “Ya, I know. But, unfortunately, I couldn’t get any leaves earlier. Besides, I want to save my leaves after marriage.”

Me: “Ok..”

Akash: “Ok.. so, what are we going to do for those 4 days before the big day? Shall we plan to hangout somewhere?”

Me: “Are you kidding? My parents won’t even let me out of the house. In fact, I don’t think they will even let you see me before the wedding. I guess you will see me for the first time only on the day of marriage”

Akash: “Hey, come on…. Let’s at least go to the beach or to a movie once… “

Me: “I told you.. my parents are very traditional and strict. I am surprised that they have even let me talk to you on phone for so many days. Sorry Akash…”

Akash: “Well, don’t inform your parents… Just try to escape from home for few hours, and we can meet. Maybe tell them that you are going to your friend’s place or something”

Me: “No Akash…. I can’t lie to my parents… If they find out later, what will they think of me… They might be strict, but they trust me…  I can’t betray them”

Akash: ”Betray? Don’t use such big words… It is such a small thing. But, it will be very exciting to meet at least once before marriage.”

Me: “Please don’t force me Akash..”

“I promise that I will be a good guy… nothing beyond holding hands…”, said Akash with a smile.

Me: “If you can somehow get my parents to agree, then I don’t have a problem. But, I can’t come without their consent”

Akash: “Don’t be silly… how can I ask your parents to send you out with me before marriage. We need to do it without their knowledge. You were asking me what gift I want from you for marriage right. Well, this is the gift I want – we need to meet once before marriage”

Me: “I asked ‘for marriage’, not ‘before marriage’. Anyway, this is not going to happen.”

Akash: “Why not? Let’s make it happen”

Me: “No”

Akash: “Yes”

Me: “No Akash… I am telling you that it won’t happen. Please don’t have any expectation.”

Akash: “Well.. I will take it as a challenge and make it happen…. “

Me: “So, you are going to ask my parents?”

Akash: “No, I can’t ask them…. I know that they won’t allow it. So, we are going to meet without their knowledge”

Me: “I won’t agree to it”

Akash: “It is going to happen. You are going to come and meet me without informing your parents”

Me: “You are just kidding right… enough teasing me.”

Akash: “I am not teasing you… We are really going to meet before marriage”

Me: “No Akash.. please… “

The argument continued for another 20 minutes. It seemed like such a small thing, but Akash seemed very stubborn. And, I was no way going to meet him without my parents’ consent. The call finally ended with the following conversation –

Akash: “If you really love me, then you will agree to meet me”

Me: “I love you Akash, but I can’t go against my parents. Why are you making such a big fuss about this small thing?”

Akash: “It is not a small thing. You will understand it only if you miss me. Bye”

Before I could say bye, he ended the call.

 

5th August, 2003

I was waiting for Akash to call me. But, he didn’t. He usually calls me by 9 in the morning. But, it was 12 pm now and he still hasn’t called me. I was also stubborn not to give him a call.

I waited till 6 in the evening. I finally gave up. I started to miss him. That was when I realized what he meant by “You will understand it only if you miss me”. So, he purposefully didn’t call me so that I miss him.

I decided to call him.

I dialed his number… The phone kept ringing… no answer… I tried again.. still no answer… I tried again.. and again… but no luck…

I looked at the clock. It was 8pm. So, it was 33 hours since we had last spoken – the longest gap since we started talking 3 months back.

I decided to give one last try…  I dialed Akash’s number…

Tring Tring…

The phone went through a complete ring without any answer. This was maybe the hundredth time I tried calling Akash in the last couple of hours. I was initially frustrated, but was getting concerned and nervous by now.

Akash and I had been engaged for almost 3 months now, and he had never failed to call me a single day (well, until today)…

I didn’t know what to do. I can’t tell anything to my parents. My only hope was to wait for Akash to call me back. But, how long.. how long should I wait? What if he doesn’t call back at all? If his intention was to make me miss him, then he has achieved it. Why can’t he call me now? He should know that I will be missing him by now…

I waited… waited.. but still no call. I was lying down on my bed, but couldn’t sleep at all. I kept staring at the phone, hoping that it would ring soon. I finally slept (I don’t know at what time).

 

6th August 2003

It seemed like the middle of the night when the phone started ringing. But, it was a different ringtone, not the one I had set for Akash. I woke up with my heart beating fast… I looked at the phone. It was the damn alarm. I had a daily alarm set for 7am. I looked at the time.. It was no longer the middle of the night… It was 7am. I checked my phone to see if there were any missed calls (hoping that maybe Akash called but I missed it in my sleep). But, there were 0 missed calls.

I immediately tried calling Akash. Again, no answer.

I half-mindedly brushed my teeth and went ahead with my daily routine. I was still hoping that he will maybe call me at 9am as usual. But, that didn’t happen as well.

I was walking around the hall not knowing what to do, when my brother called me..

Brother: “Kavya… you look so dull… what’s up? Are you free now? I am going out to get some stuff. You were telling that you needed to buy some things right? Why don’t you join me?”

I was in no mood to go shopping. I thought of maybe telling my brother the situation. But, then decided to wait. If Akash doesn’t call me by tonight, then maybe I will tell my brother first thing in the morning. I decided to go ahead shopping with my brother. At least it will keep my mind diverted for few hours.

On the way to the shop, my brother wanted to stop by a temple. I thought that it will be a good opportunity to pray to god for Akash to call me. We went inside the temple and I started praying. After a few minutes, I opened my eyes. I heard someone call my name and turned back… I was shocked by what I saw. Tears started to flow from my eyes, after the sight of what I saw in front of me. Standing right in front of me was Akash, wearing a blue checked half sleeved shirt and a jeans. I just couldn’t believe my eyes.

So, all this was actually Akash’s plan. He had planned to arrive in India today and surprise me. He had purposefully made up the argument with me and had not answered my calls. He had fooled me by saying that he was going to come only 4 days before the marriage. I felt like punching him, and at the same time hugging him. But, with people around me in the temple, I couldn’t do anything. One thing was true though – My parents didn’t know about this. Akash had planned this with my brother, and both of them had not informed my parents. They knew that my parents will never agree to let akash meet me before marriage.

We did meet a few times after that (without my parents’ knowledge of course). We finally got married on 15th September 2003 and have been married for 12 years now!!

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